This blog was created as a celebration of Joshua boy’s huge heart and life and the daily adventures and blessings of raising a child with autism and epilepsy. And to give encouragement and hope for parents who are raising a child with special needs. I love you forever my Joshua boy! (Joshua Michael Eisenstat --- January 26, 1983 - October 4, 2005)
I just came from sitting beside your grave. Tears flowed from my eyes as I continue to
ache and miss you with my very soul. I
cried, and I touched your sweet face that is on your tombstone. I thought it very appropriate today that
there were several wasps buzzing around your grave, and even lighting on the
plant that Janson is growing for you. I
think of Glenn’s story in his funeral talk how the wasps did not bite you, and
Vickie’s analogy that even the wasps knew that they did not need to fear
you. All one had to do was to let you
love them, and they could see the beauty and love that was in your soul. I wonder many days how to live without you in
my life. This may seem confusing to the
outsider who only saw the work, patience and physical strength it took to care
for you, to keep you safe, to keep you happy and to give you a fulfilled
life. But to those who truly knew you
and loved you, they know that your pure love, your innocence, your enthusiasm,
your humor, your cute personality and the light in your eyes brought an
understanding and joy to life that was your special talent and ability to
give. How hard it is for me to do so
many things – to walk into church, to go to a family, ward or neighborhood
activity, to walk into Glenn’s basketball game, to go to the park, to walk into
a store, to go to a party or celebration, etc., etc. Even I smile myself over this since many of
those very activities seemed outwardly hard for me to attend to other
people. I love Glenn’s story about how
you high-fived every player on the opposing girl’s basketball team. I remember that well since it obviously took
a few minutes to get to our seat, and there were even a few seconds there where
I wondered if we would make it to our seat, and I was certainly relieved when
we did make it there. But the lesson you
taught us in those few moments is one of the many daily lessons we all learned
from you. The opposing team was not the
enemy, they were our friends, just as every person you passed wherever you went
was your friend. I remember with a smile
on the face this one lady that sincerely asked after you gave her one of your
big greetings, “Do I know him?” and I responded that you “knew everyone.” Isn’t that so true?.JPG)
