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Wednesday, December 12, 2018

Santa saw Joshua!

2004 - Joshua's own special visit from Santa & Mrs. Claus!

Santa saw Joshua!

In this season of Christmas memories and love, I think of so many blessings and miracles through the years.  And there is one I happen to have a very special picture of!

It was December 2004 and as a single Mom I took my cute kids to our Ward Christmas party - which was a traditional dinner, program and a surprise visit from Santa & Mrs. Claus!  My kids always loved the excitement of Santa Claus appearing after all the children would sing Christmas songs as loud as they could!

Joshua, age 21 at this time, still did not understand Christmas and he never was able to stand in a line very long!  So as his hyperactivity and restlessness took over, he ran out into the foyer in the church building.  And there was no way Joshua would go back in to the gym.  Once he was done, he was done!  

So of course I ran out to the foyer with Joshua and left my younger children to finish waiting in line for Santa so they could get their special Christmas candy and sit on Santa's lap too!  And then Joshua and I just hung out in usual Joshua fashion in the foyer (running from couch to couch, saying hi to anyone who walked by and just enjoying being together.)  

Suddenly I heard a little Christmas noise, and "what to my wondering eyes should appear," but Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus!!  They were looking especially for my Joshua boy!!  I cry happy tears today to think about it!  Santa and Mrs. Claus came over and sat right with Joshua on the couch and talked to him with their Christmas cheer and Santa's Ho, Ho, Ho!  And Joshua had learned to say "Ho,  Ho, Ho" so that was pretty exciting!  They gave him the priceless gift of time and serving and loving the ONE! 

This was a moment never to be forgotten.  My friends, Julene and Kyle Fuller, had noticed that Joshua would not stand in line, and so like the best Santa's elves that they were, along with other fabulous ward member elves as well, they made sure Santa and Mrs. Claus knew there was one more precious child to visit.


Santa saw Joshua!


We did not know at the time that it was Joshua's last Christmas.  But I always believe they were all so inspired to make sure we had this very special Christmas moment and treasured picture to last a lifetime, and to bring such joy and warmth to this Mom's grateful heart.

Thank you Julene & Kyle and Parkway 3rd Ward!


And as we love about Joshua's pictures, notice the video tape in Joshua's hands - his own security blanket!  
He was rarely without his precious tape!


Friday, September 28, 2018

Weber State University Scholarship Award

Joshua and Uncle Mark
Possibly discussing how to count to 10!

Weber State University Scholarship

In Memory of
Joshua Michael Eisenstat

Sponsored by
Mark Larson, Joshua's Uncle


My youngest brother Mark graduated from Weber State University in Ogden, Utah and also taught math there as well.  For 10 years it was an honor to be a part of a special memorial scholarship awarded as follows:  For a full-time student with a declared major in mathematics, minimum WSU GPA of 3.0. First preference is given to students who provide personal service to Special Olympics or other organizations serving disabled children. Secondary preference is given to students who demonstrate exceptional extracurricular activity.



Mark and several of our family members had the blessing of awarding this special scholarship each year and it was always a special evening of memory and fun together!  My other kids have been a special part in this and I had sweet experiences with Jeremy, Jamie, Jacob and Janson with this special award.  Others who have been a part of this presentation were my Mom, Joshua's cousins - Ashley Larson, Hunter Larson and Ellie Larson.  And McDonalds was a fun part of the night as well!  We just love to celebrate Joshua!

Mark had the perfect words to describe this award:

The Joshua Eisenstat Memorial Scholarship is named after my nephew who was six years younger than me.  He was autistic and was mentally between two and three years old.  We were the best of friends his entire life and I always tried to see Joshua after a stressful finals week, for the only math he cared that I could do was count to ten if we were boxing, or three if we were wrestling.  A little over two years after I graduated, Joshua passed away.  This scholarship is in his honor, and to support Weber State which provided me with a valuable education. I feel a math scholarship is appropriate, as he did not know any historical facts, he did not complete very many sentences, and he wasn’t into the performing arts, but he loved, loved, loved counting to ten.


Thank you Mark for the many lives you blessed with this generous award, and for the countless times you hung out with Joshua.  Because he loved YOU!


Joshua and Uncle Mark - One of their many truck rides together!






Wednesday, August 1, 2018

Mother's Day Miracle


Mother’s Day Miracle

And we will also always remember this day, when a stranger turned angel, 
was inspired to bring joy and healing, as we experienced our very own Mother’s Day Miracle.


I was very much dreading this particular Mother’s Day in 2003 because after 22 years of a Temple marriage, I was now going through a very heartbreaking and painful divorce, and was having a hard time accepting and comprehending all that was going on around me.  I was also the mother of 5 children (Joshua, Jeremy, Jamie, Jacob and Janson - ages 7 to 20), but the excruciating pain and turmoil inside me was making it very difficult to look forward to a celebration of motherhood.


My brother, Doug, and his new wife, Rochelle, were asked to speak on Mother’s Day in their ward in Pleasant Grove, and so they invited me and my children to be there with them.  This invitation was an answer to prayer so that I could be with extended family at church that day.  My own ward was extremely loving and understanding, but I knew I would not be able to hold back my tears among so many close and wonderful friends.  And this needed to be a happy day for others even though my dread and sadness for this day was very real and very deep.

However, even though attending my brother’s ward was an answer to my prayers, I always had an apprehension about attending a new ward because my oldest child, Joshua, had autism, severe mental delays, hyperactivity and also had epilepsy – and can be quite distractive in church.  At age 20, over 6 feet tall and very handsome, with the behavior of a toddler, he definitely was noticeable and not very reverent.  Joshua especially loved to throw things, shake hands, say “hi, hi, hi” and give exuberant high fives to friends and strangers!  I brought homemade books and family pictures to help keep Joshua’s attention more on track.  Knowing the type of “scene” we might make, I still felt very strongly about being with Doug and Rochelle, and also supporting my brother and giving back to him just a little bit of all the support he had given to me.

As I had anticipated, our presence was certainly known because of Joshua – from the moment we walked into the church building and into the chapel.  To hopefully control the situation a bit, we sat on the back row in the chapel.  With his deep manly voice, Joshua was his usual loud with his toddler-type talking.  He also gave his special and enthusiastic happy greetings (high fives and handshakes) to anyone who walked by.  He repeatedly stood up and down, and even had a grand-mal-seizure toward the beginning of the meeting.  I was hoping and praying that we could at least make it through the Sacrament, and if that miracle happened, maybe we could even listen to Doug and Rochelle’s talks!

I noticed the obvious discomfort of people sitting near us as they tried not to stare.  My 18-year old son, Jeremy, whispered anxiously to me that “everyone is looking at us.”  I tried to assure Jeremy that everything would be fine, despite the stares, concern, curiosity and confusion (which happened on a daily basis anytime we were in a public place).  Our home ward was very loving and understanding of Joshua, and they always helped me multiple times every Sunday and even considered his “noise” to be reverent because of their deep love for him. 

Jeremy, Jamie, Jacob and Janson were very mature and did what they could to help divert Joshua’s attention to a more reverent behavior, if that was even possible.  I was always so touched by their love for Joshua.

During the Sacrament, the deacons were so reverent and impressive as they passed the bread and water.  I was extremely surprised and touched when suddenly one deacon gave Joshua a “high-five” as he passed us the tray of bread.  And then I was even further touched when a second deacon gave Joshua another “high five” when he passed us the tray of water.  High fives always brought Joshua joy as was made manifest by his noises of happiness!  What wonderful young men to be so aware and compassionate as to know just what Joshua needed during the Sacrament.  I felt like I was in my own ward, with friends showing Joshua such love and understanding.  This touched my heart deeply.  It also gave us a few extra minutes to make it through the talks as Joshua’s behavior was that much easier when he was happy even though he still could be very loud with his happy noises.

And then after the passing of the Sacrament, Bishop Gurr stood up, and began to introduce the meeting. 

He started out by saying that approximately 25 years ago, when he was a young man in that very ward, they had a very special visitor that day, and that visitor was Boyd K. Packer.  He told how President Packer was there that day to help bless a new grand-baby as his daughter was in that ward.  And he talked about how special it was to have a General Authority come, and that this was the last time a General Authority had come to this ward.  He then told the Ward that today, they had another very special visitor.  (I remember starting to look around, wondering who was there that day.) 

And then came the beautiful words I was not expecting to hear … Bishop Gurr said that this special visitor was sitting in the back row with his family, and that he was a special needs visitor.  And this very kind, compassionate and sensitive Bishop told the entire congregation that he was just as special of a visitor to this ward as Boyd K. Packer was 25 years ago.

By this point, the tears were streaming down my face as I received such a strong witness and testimony of Joshua’s worth from a bishop I had never before met.  (Jeremy said my tears looked like Niagara Falls, but this waterfall of tears were full of pure joy).  Bishop Gurr taught his ward members so much that day of pure charity, and on the worth of my very special son, by just a few words of love and compassion.  I will forever cherish these words and this very special and cherished moment. 

A few minutes later as my wonderful brother added his own words of love and support to me, I was so thankful for Heavenly Father’s love, for His awareness of my family and our needs, for the recognition of the worth of Joshua and my own worth, and for modern-day miracles given just when they are needed the most.  (D&C 18:10)

A few months later as my brother sat in Bishop Gurr’s office for an interview, he noticed Joshua’s picture on the bulletin board right next to his own children.  Doug’s surprise and question at seeing Joshua’s picture invited a very memorable answer from this compassionate bishop.  Bishop Gurr told Doug that the picture had been left behind in Sacrament meeting that day, and that he then hung the picture up on his bulletin board so that he could always remember the day he met Joshua.

And we will also always remember this day, when a stranger turned angel, was inspired to bring joy and healing, as we experienced our very own Mother’s Day Miracle.




Wednesday, January 24, 2018

BYU Hockey vs. Utah Grizzlies Special Needs Hockey

BYU Hockey vs. Utah Grizzlies Special Needs Hockey
January 14, 2018
Provo, Utah


Utah Grizzlies Special Needs Hockey vs. BYU Hockey
 Let's start with the score!  The Utah Grizzlies beat the BYU Hockey Team 23 to 5.  So it was either a blowout, or one of the most inspirational games you will ever see.  And yes, it was both!  The Special Needs players skated their hearts out and each of them scored at least one goal!  And it was definitely inspirational because these incredible BYU hockey players played against and with them at the same time!  They had hearts of gold as they helped the special needs players really play hockey by blocking, stealing and scoring against them.  But they also helped them handle the puck, pass the puck and score goals!  They were truly masters at the game at accomplishing many things at the same time!  The cheers and the high fives at each goal was incredible!  And the joy and excitement of all the players brought tears to this mom's eyes! 
This was also an extra special treat today because I had the amazing blessing and privilege to begin and manage this team the very first year in 2007.  I already knew the incredible Beck Family from t-ball and other special needs activities!  And was so excited to re-unite with Teri and Randy, and their awesome sons Mitchell, Justin and Kanu!  Teri and Randy have given their sons a truly happy and fulfilled life!  And I loved personally witnessing their very first year as hockey players.  To see the progress of all three boys was so emotionally uplifting and inspiring.  There was no doubt that these boys had incredible coaches and parents!



 Both teams played with so much heart, so much passion and so much unity!  And even though BYU "lost" 23 - 5, it was the best loss they ever had!

 Managing this team was constantly inspirational as the talented coaches, Don Homan, Randy Beck and others have sacrificed and dedicated so much time for these many special needs hockey players and given them a chance to learn and love a sport so much that it has become part of who they are as they clearly shine with their new talents and love for this incredible game!  I loved watching Reese, Jathan, Bree, Mitchell, Justin, Kanu and so many others as they worked hard and grew so much!  They are simply incredible!


In honor of Joshua, and in honor of my own three hockey sons, I was the first manager of this incredible team!  I only managed the team for one year because as much as I loved this team with all of my heart, it also broke my heart to not have my own special needs son as part of this program.  This team was healing to my broken heart as it was less than two years after Joshua died, but it was also very difficult because I missed Joshua so much!  Deann Torsak, Teri Beck and Kathy Wylie were such enthusiastic, talented and dedicated Moms that to turn the managing of the team over to them was easier because I knew they would give this team their all, and they did!  They did more with the team than I ever could have done.  Being a part of the beginning of this team will always be a blessing and honor I hold close to my heart.  I love this team!

Thank you to Mike Holmes who was the founder of this fabulous team!  His dedication and vision has brought joy to countless hockey players and parents!

Thank you to all of the coaches today:  The Coaches of the Special Needs Grizzlies:  Don Homan and Randy Beck - coaches and dads!  And the Managers of the Special Needs Grizzlies:  Deann Torsak and Teri Beck - managers and moms!  And to the BYU Hockey Coaches:  Ed Gantt, Brent Ring and Jeremy Eisenstat - coaches and heroes!  

Thank you to the Grizzlies Special Needs Players!!  You are awesome and you rock!  Your dedication, hard work and love for hockey are inspiring!  You are true heroes!

Thank you to the BYU Hockey Team!  You are incredible hockey players and incredible young men!  Watching you give time, love, joy and laughter to these special needs player on a Saturday,  just hours before a traditional hockey game, made me even prouder to be a BYU hockey mom!  You all rock!

And I'm especially filled with gratitude for my three favorite hockey players and incredible sons:  BYU Assistant Coach Jeremy Eisenstat, Captain Defenseman #5 Jacob Eisenstat, and Defenseman #17 Janson Eisenstat.  You were always an incredible and loving brother to Joshua, and that compassion, understanding and love shown through today.

If you ever want an inspiring Saturday, just come to the Peaks Ice Arena on a Saturday in the Winter at 1:00pm.  It will be an experience you will never forget.  And bring some kleenex too. 





















Me with the Amazing Team Managers - Teri Beck & Deann Torsak!
The first season of the Utah Grizzlies Trophy given in honor of my Joshua!!  This was incredible!!

Me with this incredible team and my own three hockey boys!